WTF, D&D: Cthulhu ’90s Solo Project – The Toné Out of Space (Part 2)


Zack: You escape the fire trucks and police and stop at a gas station to top off your flamethrower. Where are you going after that?

Steve: Do I have a safehouse?

Zack: No, and with Kurt missing and Eazy-E investigating that meteor in Egypt you can’t crash with them.

Steve: What about Courtney Love? Didn’t she have some sort of lab or something?

Zack: Yes! At the Univesity of Seattle where she is a tenured metaphysical professor. She operates a metaphysical geology lab.

Steve: Heading there.

Zack: As you arrive, Courtney Love and her grad students are making a deposit of rock striped with silver scream by directing ultrasound vibrations at it. She sees you walk in, looking unusually singed, and she dismisses her class. “Remember to read your Petersen, chapters three and four on transmutations of living things into stone and back again.”

Steve: “Hey Courtney, what up?”

Zack: “Just poking the stone that screams.” She puts a tarp over it. “What can I do for you, Miss Lopes?”

Steve: “Mostly I just need to use your computer to look up where Tony! Toni! Tone! is playing a show.” Plopping the tuning fork on the counter. “But I found these things called like a Zaladoksky fork from the 1800s that is related to a case I’m investigating. Any idea?”

Zack: It’s Zladislavsky Fork. Courtney Love puts on a jeweler’s loupe and leans down to have a look at the tuning fork. She picks it up and looks it over.

Zack: “It seems to be a relatively normal iron fork, but see these greenish flecks? I can’t identify this metal. It’s not copper. I don’t even know how they would make a composite like this in the 19th century. Do you mind if I subject it to some tests?”

Steve: “Sure, just don’t point it at space or anything because then a creepy meatball might appear and making us all go crazy.”

Zack: “This is going to take a while,” she says and carries it over to a big machine. “The computer is in my office in the back.”

Steve: Alright, going online. Checking for any Tony! Toni! Tone! concerts.

Zack: There’s one in Seattle tonight at the Showbox. It starts in less than an hour!

Steve: “Courtney, I gotta go. If something goes wrong… tell Kurt and E not to trust Tony! Toni! Tone!”